Some Misplaced Beliefs
A man boards a flight from Delhi to Mumbai and
takes his seat. As he settles down after placing his belongings / goods etc. at
the right place, he glances up and sees a gorgeous woman boarding the aeroplane.
He soon realizes she is heading straight towards his seat. As she takes steps
proceeding quite confidently, the man is quite excited to see that she really
takes the seat just next to his. Eager to strike up a conversation with the
beautiful young woman, he asks - "Business trip or vacation?" She turns, gives a
passing smile, and replies, "Neither business, nor vacations, rather it is an
official tour, as I am going Mumbai to attend the Annual Sexologists' Conference
being organised there."
He still finds it difficult to believe that a young
woman is really going to attend such a convention, which is practically still a
taboo in context to the majority of the Indian society. However, lost in his own
thoughts, he says to himself - Here is the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen,
and sitting just next to him, and she is a sexologist! Struggling hard to
contain his excitement & enthusiasm and maintain his composure, he calmly puts a
query to her, "By the way, what is your official role in this conference?”
"You see ! I am a Professor," she says, "I use my
knowledge and experiences to debunk or offset some of the popular beliefs and
myths about sexuality going about in the minds of most of the people." The man
is again a bit more surprised, a bit bamboozled as well, and his curiosity goes
on increasing.
"Really?" he says, finding it difficult to digest the
version of the young lady that she is a lecturer and that too, on Sexuality,
which is really very rare looking through the prism of Indian culture and
traditions. And he shoots one more question to her, "By the way! Would you like
to explain as to what are those myths or beliefs?" "Well," she starts
explaining, “One of the most popular belief is that African men are the best
endowed with manly power, vigour and energy and art while performing in
bed-rooms, whereas, in the fact is that , it is the Tamilians who are most
likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the
best lovers, whereas - actually it is our own Indian Bengalis, as you may
realise yourself after reading our rich Bengali literature. However, you may be
all the more perplexed to note that - our own research proves that the best
potential lovers in all these categories are the Punjabis.
You may be aware that all ancient lovers find a
respectable place in our epic Love Stories, which lakhs of people (all over the
Asian countries) just cherish to read - were all Punjabis, whether they belonged
to today's Punjab with India or pre-independence and from undivided Punjab,
which is now with Pakistan, for example - Heer-Ranjha, Sassi-Punnu,
Mirza-Sahiban, Sohni-Mahiwal, Sheeri-Farihaad, Laila-Majnu, and Keema-Malki etc.
etc......!! And their entire conversations of the main protagonists of all these
love stories - were all steeped in love and romance – in the same manner as the
monsoon winds are laden with dark clouds – ready to shower the much desired
relief in the form of rainfall ! Perhaps, you may be aware that they were all
Punjabis, and it may be due to some hidden traits of the water and soil of
Punjab that they were made like true lovers ...... the fragrance of love really
blossoms and flourishes awefully and replenishes beautifully on the soils of
Punjab ........ that is the real virtue of the Punjabis, which needs to be
imbibed and inculcated by most of the people in case they really want to learn
the art of love & romance and live in long lasting peace and harmony......."
Suddenly, the woman becomes a little bit conscious &
uncomfortable and blushes and adjusts herself back to the seat and then, she
suddenly also puts a break on her conversation and says, "I am sorry," she says,
I should not be discussing all these things with you, as after all, I don't even
know your name?"
To this, the man calmly but confidently replied, "My
dear co-passenger ! I am Venkatraman, and my full name is Venkatraman Singh
Mukherjee ! But let me also apprise you that all my friends, dears and nears who
know me well, prefer to call me Joginder Singh !!” And then, looking straight
into her eyes, he said, “And now, it is upto you as to by what name, you may
like to call or address me ......... My ears will just love to listen your sweet
and melodious voice........"
The strange and unique introduction of the man made
the lady Professor flabbergasted. She looked at him astonishingly as she was
stunned, flummoxed, swept away, surprised, rendered speechless, dumbfound,
amazed, astounded and shocked ......... all rolled into one. She swirled her
wide open eyes-balls at him, as no other man had ever introduced himself like
her current co-passenger had done, just a short while ago. And she continued
looking at him from head to toe so as to realise and make an assessment - with
what type of man she is travelling right now. Then suddenly, as she seemed to
have recovered from her trance, she coyly, makes her hand move and on finding
that her neighbour's hand is resting on the arm of his seat, she slowly spreads
her hand on his hand, and reacts - "I am pleased to meet you ! But, I would also
like to delve a little bit deeper into the realms of your personality after my
convention is over.......... By the way, what do you do?" And the man replied,
“My dear fair lady ! I am a writer and I write in two / three languages …… as
the time and situation may demand.” And on hearing this, the lady Prof. retorted
back, rather eagerly and with a sense of satisfaction, “Oh ! I see ! I find that
you are a fit case for me to study properly, to unfold the mysterious layers of
your personality, and I will certainly love to do that after I return back to
Delhi. You just give me your contact details. Of course, I would also like to
know your real name, as I feel that the name by which you have introduced
yourself, may be only your pen-name and certainly not the real one !!”
By : R.D. Bhardwaj
“Noorpuri”
Dated : 14th Sept., 2012
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